Although Alice favors her Mom, she still (just like her Mom) pretends to like me now and then. She has at least learned that agreeing that her Dad is the Meanest Dad in the World just provides an excuse for him.
Anyway, a couple of weeks back Alice managed to get some nasty splinters in her foot again. Mom worked on the splinters for a bit, trying to make progress against a screaming and spasming Alice. She got one but left the other one while we tried soaking Alice in a bath to see if that might get it to pop out like last time. That was unsuccessful, so I was sent in to avoid any further damage to Mom’s reputation. Alice was very upset about having additional sharp objects stuck in to her foot, but I pointed out that the alternative was to have her foot hurt forever and make it so she couldn’t dance. I think the bath helped a lot, as with just a little bit of digging I managed to hook the splinter and get it out. I told Alice she was done being attacked by the Evil Daddy and she said “No, you are the nicest Daddy in the world”. Maybe I should arrange for more splinters.